Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
