I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
