playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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