I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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