You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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