YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
