Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
