If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Randomize
