Taylor Swift is so right about you.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
