girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize