We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
