No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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