dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
