I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
