But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
