Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
