I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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