shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Randomize
