Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
