i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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