there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
