I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize