So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize
