How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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