The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
