So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Randomize