Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I'm at about main and main street
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
