you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize
