they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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