I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
