Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
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