Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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