Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
