my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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