i don't like sucking hair
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
