so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
