the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I am available for nakedness
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
