shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize
