Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
