Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Randomize
