do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
