Do vagina's smell?
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
