I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize
