What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Randomize
