Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
