i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
