i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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