Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
