I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
