talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
