She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
